I dislike regretting things, but I have one for 2008: I wish I had fixed more relationships and things.
I ended up mending one broken bridge, but I have yet to see him or talk to him in person since then, so it may not count. I'll wish him a happy birthday on Friday.
This segues well into my New Year's resolutions:
In 2009 I will fix everything; all of my mistakes that began in 2007, they will all be patched over in 2009. I resolve to stop ruining other people's lives and turn my own around. Things are already at a great start. I will not jinx them by mentioning specifics, but I will, hopefully for the last time, make a plea for patience with me.
There are a specific pair of people for whom I have been a colossal thorn. For 2009, I am setting aside my own needs, wants, and aspirations to ensure that these two people will get exactly what they have been waiting for by the end of the year, and maybe more. This has gone on for approximately 1.4 years too long, but I will end it in 2009.
Another person, for whom I have just been a minor nuisance, will get exactly what is owed, and I am NOT referring exclusively to the events of November 2007. This person has been more than a friend, going above and beyond what anyone could ever possibly ask of someone, and all I have to show in grattitude is the most sincere,heartfelt thank-you I have ever offered someone. Words cannot express how much I appreciate having this person in my life in my time of need, and by the end of 2009, I will deliver a proper thanks, one that will express how immensely grateful I am for their presence and support.
I also resolve not to be an idiot. For a while I thought I had that covered, but I wouldn't be resolving not to now if I had.
My last resolution is to finish all of the games that I have bought in the past and have since taken to sitting on my shelf. The Final Fantasies, the Xenosagas, Disgaea 1+2, Magna Carta...all of them. I have no business buying more RPGS before I finish all of the ones I currently own. I might pick up some PS2 memory cards on clearance later in the year to accomodate all of my final saves...I don't take kindly to the idea of deleting the proof of 40+hour investments/timeburning.
Happy New Year!
Currently listening to Ozma (In my head...8P)
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Saturday, December 27, 2008
This post's a roller coaster.
Yeah, I know, two days late. I've been pretty busy. My grandparents whom I have not seen in ages visited. My grandad's in pretty rough shape, but I'm glad he was able to make it out to GA. Tomorrow they're leaving for Louisiana first thing in the morning, so I had to say my goodbyes before I left for work today, as they are staying in a nearby hotel, because I am occupying the guest room at my father's house. Yeah, things have been pretty hectic.
So, as of late I have a real lock on how I will be drawing the strip. As soon as I get home to my comfy condo and drafting table, I will work out how I want to color it, whether digital or watercolor. Or digital watercolor! Either way, it will look good. I will demand it of the paper. As for the website, I have to figure out how to get all the latest-gen browsers to correctly read .css files so I can be absolutely sure my layout looks ok before I drop unknown amounts of cash on webspace. I will commit to posting SOMETHING on January 5, the first Monday of the New Year. That is, if I haven't gotten the control box for my new metal DDR pad by then. Otherwise, all bets are off on how I'm going to be spending my spare time...8D.
On a darker note, I attended a funeral today, for a friend with whom I went to high school. This was the second funeral I had attended, but this was a little more personal. It was held in a Catholic church. Upon entering, I was immediately crushed by the guilt Catholics feel they must impress unto themselves and others. I also got a taste of the endless Christian pageantry not found in most other denominations...excluding Evangelism. That being said, reality set in when I finally saw the casket, and I realized the gravity of what death meant...that a body with whom I had been friends lay in it, and that would be the last time I'd be in his presence again. At that point, I lost it. I privately sobbed in the back row, gathered my wits and dried my eyes and followed the casket and its procession outside, where it departed for final interment. I'm glad I wasn't present for that, I would have been subjected to Taps (He was shot in Afghanistan in service of the United States Army). Let me share a little story about Taps:
I was a Boy Scout growing up, and being the only kid in my troop who was also in band, I was designated the troop Bugler, which, IMO, was the best job to hold. I was responsible for telling everybody to get up with Revielle and salute the flag with...I forget the name, and to go to bed with Taps. For years I played Taps, and all it ever meant to me was that it was time to go to bed. It definitely is a mournful song, and I played it accordingly, but I had never heard it played for a burial.
A year or two back, a close friend of my father was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. It quickly overtook him, and he died two weeks short of the month his doctor said he had left. That was my first funeral, and I was composed for most of it, until I heard the most somber performance of Taps in what may as well be human history. At that moment, I truly understood Taps' s meaning and significance, and I fell to my knees and cried. I had played and played it well for years and the thought of death never crossed my mind until that one singular place in time, everything was just so clear to me. So from that day on, I hold the feeling I experienced that day in my chest when I play Taps, now annually on September 11th, from the highest point I'm allowed to get to. A year ago, I played it off the top of the SCAD-Atlanta building over the interstate at rush hour, as the sky began to turn a polluted orange. I was suprised to see traffic start slowing as I played. (That bugle gets REALLY loud). I'll never forget the feeling of instant, heavy-handed comprehension.
On that note, I have to get back to doing nothing at my job.
So, as of late I have a real lock on how I will be drawing the strip. As soon as I get home to my comfy condo and drafting table, I will work out how I want to color it, whether digital or watercolor. Or digital watercolor! Either way, it will look good. I will demand it of the paper. As for the website, I have to figure out how to get all the latest-gen browsers to correctly read .css files so I can be absolutely sure my layout looks ok before I drop unknown amounts of cash on webspace. I will commit to posting SOMETHING on January 5, the first Monday of the New Year. That is, if I haven't gotten the control box for my new metal DDR pad by then. Otherwise, all bets are off on how I'm going to be spending my spare time...8D.
On a darker note, I attended a funeral today, for a friend with whom I went to high school. This was the second funeral I had attended, but this was a little more personal. It was held in a Catholic church. Upon entering, I was immediately crushed by the guilt Catholics feel they must impress unto themselves and others. I also got a taste of the endless Christian pageantry not found in most other denominations...excluding Evangelism. That being said, reality set in when I finally saw the casket, and I realized the gravity of what death meant...that a body with whom I had been friends lay in it, and that would be the last time I'd be in his presence again. At that point, I lost it. I privately sobbed in the back row, gathered my wits and dried my eyes and followed the casket and its procession outside, where it departed for final interment. I'm glad I wasn't present for that, I would have been subjected to Taps (He was shot in Afghanistan in service of the United States Army). Let me share a little story about Taps:
I was a Boy Scout growing up, and being the only kid in my troop who was also in band, I was designated the troop Bugler, which, IMO, was the best job to hold. I was responsible for telling everybody to get up with Revielle and salute the flag with...I forget the name, and to go to bed with Taps. For years I played Taps, and all it ever meant to me was that it was time to go to bed. It definitely is a mournful song, and I played it accordingly, but I had never heard it played for a burial.
A year or two back, a close friend of my father was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. It quickly overtook him, and he died two weeks short of the month his doctor said he had left. That was my first funeral, and I was composed for most of it, until I heard the most somber performance of Taps in what may as well be human history. At that moment, I truly understood Taps' s meaning and significance, and I fell to my knees and cried. I had played and played it well for years and the thought of death never crossed my mind until that one singular place in time, everything was just so clear to me. So from that day on, I hold the feeling I experienced that day in my chest when I play Taps, now annually on September 11th, from the highest point I'm allowed to get to. A year ago, I played it off the top of the SCAD-Atlanta building over the interstate at rush hour, as the sky began to turn a polluted orange. I was suprised to see traffic start slowing as I played. (That bugle gets REALLY loud). I'll never forget the feeling of instant, heavy-handed comprehension.
On that note, I have to get back to doing nothing at my job.
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